Think About This
By Kristen Ivy,
Elizabeth Hansen
I remember
a few years ago when I was leading a small group and one of the girls had
stopped attending. I knew she was making some unwise choices related to
drinking, and she was choosing not to come to church anymore because she didn’t
want to feel judged. But here’s the interesting thing: she still liked hanging
out. We would meet from time to time, at Starbucks, at a school event,—anywhere
that she knew we would have fun. And
in those moments, I didn’t talk
about her decisions. She knew what I thought. But I knew at that juncture in
her life, it was more important to have fun and stay connected than to continue
reminding her of something she already knew.
Hint:
most kids and teenagers shut down when you take the eye-to-eye, “let’s talk
about what’s going on” approach, they tend to talk when they’re engaged in a
fun activity, not making eye contact, and feel in control of the agenda.
If
you’re a parent, you may need to set aside time with your kids when you agree
not to discuss their issues. This can be especially true if they are in a tough
season of life. When the tension is high, you need a scheduled break—just to
have fun together.
It’s
not that fun is the most important thing. If you give teenagers words and
stories that are boring, they may not care. If you belong to a tribe that never
laughs, they won’t want to be a part of it.
So
whatever you do this week,
make it fun.
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